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Question- I am a 46 -year -old working woman and run a small restaurant in Ranchi. I was divorced seven years ago. Before that I was a housewife. After separating from my husband, I started my restaurant with the help of my deposits and father, which is now quite successful. One and a half years ago it was discovered that I have third stage breast cancer. My world has changed from that day onwards. I saw a lot of sorrows in my life, lived with the abusive husband for so many years, didn’t anything suffer. But when it was finalized that everything is fine in life, then the news of this cancer broke me. My daughter is 17 years old. I have many responsibilities. I have just started living. I do not want to die so soon. Doctors keep giving hope, but these days I only think of dying in my mind. Nothing disturbed me mentally as much as this disease has done. Tell me how to be positive at this time, be happy. How should I assure myself that everything will be cured.
Expert – Dr. Drona Sharma, Consultant Psychiatrist, Ireland, UK. Members of the UK, Irish and Gibraltar Medical Council.
You have recently come to know about your cancer. First of all, I want to say that I am aware of how frightening this news must have been for you. In such a situation, it is completely normal to feel fear, confusion, anger and even numbness. These emotions are part of the condition that the doctor says “Adjustment Disorder”- “The natural way of mind to deal with the news that changes life.”
But at the same time I also want to say that cancer is not an automatic death sentence. Here I am sharing some facts with you, which can be helpful in reducing your fear.
What is going on in your mind at this time
Whenever someone comes to know about cancer, his brain often goes into a catstrophy mode. This means that at this time there may be some such thoughts in your mind:
- “My life is over.”
- “I’m going to die.”
- “Now nothing will be the same as before.”
- “Nothing can be worse than this.”
These ideas are true and scary, but they are not based on medical facts. These are called cognitive disturbances, when our brain imagines the most visual situations in a state of anxiety and fear and draws the worst results. But these things are not factual.
Cancer survival rate all over the world
Here I am giving you some real figures:
World Cancer Surrender Rate
- Breast cancer: 91 out of 100 people live at least 5 years.
- Prostate Cancer: 98 out of 100 people live at least 5 years
- Colorectal Cancer: In total 65 out of 100 people live at least 5 years (90 out of 100 people if found on time.)
- Lung Cancer: 25 out of 100 people live at least 5 years (if it is detected on time, 61 out of 100 people).
Cancer Survival Rate in India
The rate of cancer in India depends on many facts, such as cancer type, cancer stage, health care facility and the socio-economic status of the individual. Nevertheless, some recent figures are quite encouraging.
Breast Cancer Surrender Rate in India
- On average, 60 to 70% of people live for 5 years.
- If the cancer is detected quickly, the survival rate can be 85-90%.
The effect of cancer on the mind
As the above data is evident that getting cancer does not mean the end of life. But since it is a serious disease, it affects the body more than it affects the body. Often people are more affected by his emotional effect and negative thinking. It is also scientifically pruvenous that our mind, mind, thinking and emotional state affect recovery. Therefore, it is necessary to be positive, keep your mind strong and to see only facts in a scientific way.
Cancer and Emotional Health: Self Screening Tool
Before proceeding, I am giving you a self -screening tool to understand my emotional state better. There are 20 questions in this test. You have to rate these questions on a scale of 0 to 3. 0 means ‘absolutely no’ and 3 means ‘all the time, always’. After giving the score to every question according to his answer, you have to check your score.
The questions are in graphic below. The interpretation of the score is also given in the graphic. First answer the questions and then check its interpretation according to your score.
How to compete with cancer by being positive
Four weeks self -help plan
First week: challenge your scary thoughts
Target: Realistic thinking of terrible thinking
Daily Task: To note every scary thought that comes in the mind in the diary.
Whenever you have any scary idea about cancer in your mind, write it in the diary and ask yourself:
- What is that idea? (Example: “I am going to die.”)
- What is the evidence supporting this idea? (Usually evidence is very low.)
- What are the evidence that proves this idea wrong? (Surrender, Advance Treatment Facility etc.)
- If this idea comes to the mind of my best friend, what would I say to him?
- What is a more balanced way to think about it?
Example:
Scary idea: “My life is over.”
Balanced idea: “My life is changing, and I am scared, but many people suffering from cancer live a happy life at the time of treatment and even after that.”
Second week: calm your mind
Target: Reduce the anxiety and keep the mind calm and happy in a present moment
Daily Task:
5 minutes breathing exercise: Counting up to 4, take breath in, stop the breath until 4 count, then leave the breath out to 6.
Body scan: Lie in the state of shavasana and pay attention to every part of your body. Feel every part from toes to head.
Grounding Technology: Look around you and name these things-
- 5 things you can see.
- 4 things you can touch.
- 3 things you can hear.
- 2 things you can sniff.
- 1 thing you can taste.
Why do these exercises: You cannot control cancer, but you can definitely control how much time you will spend in thinking about cancer, worrying, fear and nervousness.
Third week: Living life openly
Target: Keep a meaningful work while fighting cancer
Daily Task:
- Do any small activity every day, in which you get happiness. As:
- Reading a book.
- Watching a favorite film.
- Watch an episode of one of your favorite web series.
- Talking to someone who cares for you.
- Doing some light physical activity every day, such as a little walk, or a little stretching. (On the advice of a doctor.)
- To express your feelings through writing, art or music.
Remember: You are still the same person who was before cancer diagnosis. Cancer has just happened to you, you are not that.
Fourth week: looking forward to the future
Target: Set a realistic goal for yourself, finding meaning in every experience of life.
Daily Task:
- Set a small goal for yourself every day. Something that can be easily completed.
- Think of things that are most important for you.
- Think about how your experience can be useful for others.
- Create a “HOPE List”- those things that you want to do after completion of cancer treatment.
Practical steps for living positive
1. Focus on facts, not fear
Whenever your mind thinks about the worst situations, remind yourself the figures of survival. Print them and keep them with you.
2. Think about that day in a day
Instead of thinking that “I will have cancer throughout my life,” think “today I am taking care of myself and following my treatment plan.”
3. Create your support team
- Tell the trusted friends and family what you want.
- Joint cancer support group (online or individually).
- Consider taking counseling- it is a sign of strength, not weakness.
4. Keep connect with what is important
- Keep working on your choice.
- Stay connected with your relationships. Do not cut off.
- Maintain your sense of humor – laughter is really medicine.
5. Celebrate every small win
- Celebrate it after completion of every step of treatment.
- Whatever happens, try to keep yourself busy and spend a good day.
- Write your every experience.
- Think how these experiences can be useful for others tomorrow.
When is it necessary to get professional help
Generally, it is easy to fight and recover the disease with the help of its will power and family. But in some situations it is also necessary to take professional help. Below are some points in the graphic. If you feel any of these symposes, then take a professional help immediately.
conclusion
In the end, I just want to tell you that your fear and anxiety is natural. But remember, thousands of people have gone through this path before you. He not only beat him by fighting cancer, but now he is also living a meaningful, happy life. You have every reason to look at the future with hope. The biggest thing is that you have the courage and strength that you can compete with difficulty. Follow your treatment plan and remember that this chapter is not the last chapter of your life. After this, many more new chapters are written, which you will write in very beautiful words and new colors yourself. …………………… Read this news too … Mental Health- Mummy-Papa left me in childhood: Nana-wife brought up, I am in deep depression since the grandmother left, what should I do
I am 29 years old. When I was one and a half years old, my parents got divorced. Mummy got married second and left me to Nani. I did not even see my father till the age of 19. Both never contacted me. I was raised by maternal grandparents, and I had a deep emotional association with grandmother. Nana died two years ago and Nani died six months ago. Since then I have gone into deep depression. What shall I do? Read full news …
